Archives of Payne

January 24th today, and we’re still unbeaten in 2026. January 2026 kicks January 2025’s arse! Come on, let’s take our wins where we can.

Before last Saturday’s game, the club paid tribute to former colleague, Dale Harris, who tragically passed away on January 12th. Dale served the club as a matchday volunteer, a coach and education officer with the Community Trust, and as Head of Commercial during our promotion season, before moving on to become the commercial manager at Chadderton FC. He was a lovely bloke, a great servant to our club and our town, and he’ll be missed terribly. All our love to his family. A Go Fund Me page has been set up to support them, which you can donate to here. Rest in peace, Dale.

We hadn’t played for 16 days before the Cheltenham game, and it showed. Our opponents didn’t exactly look like world beaters, but they looked very different to the team that were clearly trying to get their manager sacked in September. Looking back at the highlights, I’d forgotten how many chances Payne was involved in early on, which makes me saying he should have been subbed at half-time all the sillier. We could have had a penalty when their keeper appeared to bring down Drummond in the box, but the referee said that the ball had already gone out of play. Hmmmm.

We couldn’t really have any complaints about their penalty, though. Bickerstaff looked for a foul, and found one, with Daniels leaving his foot out and making a clumsy challenge. Hudson went the right way, but Thomas put the ball through his hands. Bugger.

We were looking rusty, and it was not an enjoyable opening 45 minutes, but thank fuck for Joe Garner, who buried Woods’ corner with a bullet header at the far post to level the score just before the break. Andy was at the bar and missed it. You are all, once again, welcome.

Fondop came on for Hannant after half time, and I grumbled that it should have been Payne to come off, because I am a dickhead. We looked much livelier in the second half. Mikey won a free kick early on, and Garner headed Woods’ ball into the box across goal, but Young headed it away before Drummond could get on the end of it. Payne made a good run forward and has his shot saved shortly after. “What the fuck’s he doing shooting?” Like I say, dickhead. Garner had an optimistic long range shot that Day had to pull off a great save to keep out. It would have been a superb goal.

The comeback, and confirmation of my status as a dickhead, was completed an hour in. From a throw-in, Fondop caught Cheltenham off guard with an improvised overhead kick into the box from near the corner flag, Garner headed it across goal, and Kai fucking Payne, of all fucking people, hammered it home for his first senior goal. Well done, son. Sorry I doubted you.

We made a double substitution 74 minutes in, with Hawkes and Quigley coming on for Drummond and Garner, and we immediately looked like we missed Drummond’s pace and Garner’s aggression, sitting deeper and putting ourselves under pressure. Hudson kept us in the game, making a brave save from Miller, a more comfortable save after Thomas hit his shot into the ground, and a great stop from Martin’s curling shot.

We made much harder work of the second half than we should have, and shout out to the ball boys, who played their part in frustrating Cheltenham. It seemed to drain some of the energy out of our opponents exactly when we needed it. By this point, Frank Rothwell OBE was in with the Athleticos, urging the team on, wearing his medal. Because of course he was.

We haven’t half missed some chances this season, and last Saturday was no exception. Fondop hit Cheltenham on the break, and unselfishly squared the ball to the unmarked Quigley, who hit the post when it really did look easier to score. Drummond would have put it away. Maybe.

Thankfully, it didn’t cost us, we saw the game out, and playing Singing the Blues over the tannoy at full time was a very nice touch. Let’s gloss over who City lost to, eh? Fondop and Drummond teaming up for a double-triple-fist-pump was incredibly heart-warming. Not the most entertaining match, but in its own way, a lovely afternoon.

Mellon conceded that we were “a wee bit rusty” after the game, and praised the players’ gritty, workmanlike performance. When asked if that had been Payne’s best performance so far, he replied “no, he’s played miles better than that for us” and highlighted his work rate and the unseen work he does.

Garner also spoke highly of Payne – “a really good young pro” – and also gave credit to Fondop for his looping ball into the box, which “was coming down with snow on it”. Payne returned the compliment, saying Garner was “class all game”. Garner also spoke about the buzz around the club – “it’s an enjoyable place to come and work every day” – which hopefully is part of the reason he’s delaying his retirement.

Mellon’s repeatedly said that we have to move some players out in order to bring some in, so it perhaps wasn’t the greatest shock when we announced that Will Sutton was going on loan to Solihull for the rest of the season, but it was a little disappointing. He was the only homegrown player in the first team squad, he’s never let us down when called upon (in whatever position), and he looked really impressive during his run in the team in September. The half-arsed unprofessional effort by the Cheltenham players in the aforementioned away game earlier in the season shouldn’t detract from what a great performance Sutton put in that day. Good luck to the lad.

Safe journey and kudos to you if you’re trekking down to Barnet for a lunchtime KO today rather than watching it on the TV in your pyjamas, as some of us lightweight part-timers will be doing. We’ll be in the Kingsbury Wetherspoons in spirit. Let’s keep this unbeaten streak going. Or, at the very least, make Mark Shelton go off crying in the first half again. KTMFF. 

Written by Arlene Finnigan. Photos © Phill Smith and Thomas Lee Stacey.